Welcome to 45

Posted on Posted in Life

It took me forty-five-and-a-half years to discover how college girls with low self-esteem feel. I went to see the doctor this morning for a “routine physical”. I was anxious and apprehensive, not sure what to expect. I debated with myself for what seemed like forever, trying to decide what to wear. In the end, what I wore never really mattered to the doctor.

He kept me waiting forever, he violated me anally, told me I was fat, then left me half-dressed and crying.

Now I’m just waiting for him to call.

[drops mic] I’m out.

(Hey, you’re going to get 40 posts in 40 days. I’m not going to guarantee they’ll all be LONG.)

7 thoughts on “Welcome to 45

  1. Skoog, I see your humiliating anal probe and I raise you a vagina. I mean, I don’t literally “see” your probe … You know what I mean.

  2. Watercooler Friend, I humbly bow to the greater suffering that women endure. I can’t top that. (And, plus, I need to go get a paper towel and wipe Diet Coke off my monitor.)

    On a related note, this post has been a fascinating (unintended) social experiment. The focal point of the post completely depends on your gender. Guys see nothing but the rectal probe. Women see nothing but, “He called you fat?!”
    It’s a comparative statement on what frightens us.

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