Last week at church they showed a video clip of the guy from whom I ripped off the title of my blog. His name's Mark Gungor. And his premise is basically that men's and women's brains are just constructed differently.
Funny and accurate. We're constructed differently. It's not good or bad. It just is.
Don't believe it? Try planning a bike ride.
Eric: We should do that Tuesday Night Time Trial next week.
Me: Next Tuesday I'm supposed to go out to dinner with Erin. But the chances are really good that she's going to blow me off. If she does, let's do it!
Eric: When do they start? 5:30 or 6?
Me: Corinne and Paulette were going to go for a ride tonight, but Corinne wasn't feeling well, so they bagged it.
Eric: Yeah, I heard about that. I made the mistake of asking Gina if she was going along.
Me: What happened?
Eric: She said, "I wasn't invited." She's a little bit hurt.
Me: Corinne was just the opposite. She kept asking me, "Why is Paulette asking ME to go for a ride?"
Eric: What did you tell her?
Me: I said, "For starters, there's the distinct possibility that she enjoys your company, since you two are FRIENDS. But, beyond that, didn't you just tell me two days ago about the conversation you and Paulette had about how great it would be if there was a women's group ride that just went out to ride at a nice, slow, casual pace?"
Eric: Oh, THAT's why they didn't invite Gina.
Me: Right. So Corinne says, "So is Paulette saying I'm slow?" I said, "No, she's saying perhaps you might like to go for a no-pressure, slow ride." And she says, "That means she thinks I'm slow." I said, "But you DO want to go for a nice, no-pressure, slow ride." She says, "I know that. But she didn't have to call me slow. I think she just called me fat, too. And why didn't she invite Gina or Rebecca?" And here's where I made my big mistake.
Eric: Uh oh.
Me: I said, "Because they ride faster. There's nothing good or bad about it – they just do it more often." And she says, "You just called me slow and fat, too."
Me: And I said, "No I didn't. Look, you like to go out and just pedal around casually. Rebecca is more driven to ride races."
Eric: You dumb shit.
Me: So she says, "What? I'm not driven? I do X, Y and Z at work…" And I tried to correct myself…
Eric: But it was too late.
Me: I said, "Of course you're driven at work. You're amazing. You're a rock star. But I'm talking about riding bikes here," And she says, "No we're not, we're talking about whether or not I'm driven." And I tried to point out that you can't be driven in all possible directions simultaneously. There's no such thing as universal drive.
Eric: How'd that go?
Me: We ended up discussing the definition for the word "driven" and I admitted that I was completely and profoundly wrong and had chosen the absolute wrong word.
Eric: Nice try. So are they going to go for a ride or what?
Me: I think so. Someday. They haven't set a date yet.